Anxious Student Desperately Hopes Friend Visiting From Home Has Fun Weekend

66 COMMONWEALTH AVE — After suffering through a lengthy and arduous series of texts, Alex Delamigo (CSOM ’19), has announced that he will be hosting his hometown friend Todd this upcoming weekend. Although Delamigo, a native of nearby Waltham, Massachusetts, claimed to have “no official plans,” his friend from home insisted upon the visit and getting out of Waltham for the day. After numerous ambiguous responses about his plans, Delamigo could no longer ward off Todd after receiving the text, “I’m fine just hanging out. I don’t mind not going to a party or anything.”

Delamigo’s proximity to his hometown leaves him susceptible to unprompted visits from high school friends such as Todd on a weekly basis. The short 27-minute drive back to his comfy hometown gives his friends a perfect opportunity to casually swing over to Chestnut Hill, oftentimes on the flimsiest of self-invitations.

With Todd’s impending arrival, Delamigo desperately hopes that his high school buddy will have a good time. Delamigo’s deceiving weekend Snapchats makes him appear to be having a wild, incomparable time at school, week after week. Snapchats filled with dartys, beer pong, and sick rippers in the mods paint Boston College as an unrealistically fun and crazy place. “I’m pretty worried that Todd is going to see right through my charade and realize that nothing here is ever that wild. He goes to Framingham State, so I definitely need to show him a good time… I’m sure we can just swing over to the Mods, but will that be enough?”

At press time, Delamigo had already started preparing for the weekend, and was seen entering his double with a 30-pack of Natty Light and a handle of Rubinoff crammed into a duffel bag.


Legal: The NEC is a dope work of satire.