• robzombie

    Plex Bro Takes Good Look Around Before Set to Make Sure People Are Watching

    FLYNN RECREATION COMPLEX — Standing in front of the cable machine while mentally preparing himself for another set of a tricep exercise, frequent Plex-goer Rob Schlossman (CSOM ‘19) checked his surroundings to ensure that someone would be watching him work out. Unable to find anyone at first, the sophomore eventually established brief eye contact with […]

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    WTF, ResLife? Why Is My Dad Moving Out Of The House?

    Four words about ResLife? Worst. University Office. Ever. Allow me to explain: The FAT CATS in the Boston College Office of Residential Life think they’re all HIGH AND MIGHTY—especially this week—because they control housing decisions at Boston College. They mock students on Twitter with GIFs, reveling in their ephemeral relevancy and using humor to create […]

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    This Homeless Man Doesn’t Get To Live In Walsh, Either

    Every March at Boston College, countless groups of eight freshman are devastated after not receiving a pick time early enough for one of Lower Campus’ coveted suites. Instead, they are forced to break up into smaller groups and cross their fingers for a nine-man—or even just a double in 66. They make jokes around dining […]

  • meatball

    ResLife Clerical Error Gives One Lucky Freshman Housing In Meatball Obsession Stand

    LOWER CAMPUS — As many Boston College freshmen continue their frantic social scramble to secure housing for next year, one lucky student will be living somewhere a little more unique than the typical sophomore housing options, thanks to a clerical error by an entry-level ResLife employee. Vito Anthony Bertucci, Jr. (MCAS ’20) will spend his […]

  • reschoice

    “ResChoice” Students Demand More Say In Housing Process

    OFFICE OF RESIDENTIAL LIFE — A new protest movement on campus has started to gain noticeable traction this week, as hundreds of students are coming together to express their frustration with the notoriously tedious Boston College room selection process. These student activists, who describe themselves as “ResChoice,” are finally speaking up after years of oppression […]



Oops! I “Leaned In” Too Far And Fucked My Professor

Women have come a long way in the workplace since the days of Rosie the Riveter. Pioneers like Sheryl Sandberg of Facebook and her feminist manifesto Lean In, which I read the first chapter of over winter break, urge women to “lean in” at the physical and figurative table and fight against the systematic oppression […]


Lady Win! This Finance Major Is Slated To Be Her Own Sugar Daddy

FULTON HALL — Sabrina Connors (CSOM ’17) accepted a full-time offer from JP Morgan Chase at the Career Fair this past Wednesday. This is an incredible feat for Connors and an amazing example for all aspiring BC businesswomen to follow – almost as incredible as her underlying feminist victory: she plans on becoming her own sugar […]


I’m A Feminist, But Don’t Think I Won’t Cry To Get What I Want

Hey, don’t get me wrong—I totally think women should be equal to men. And that seventy-something cents to the dollar pay gap is total bull! Women’s rights are human rights, plain and simple. But just because I think that women and men should make the same amount of money for the same job doesn’t mean […]


I Thought I Was His Date, But It Turns Out I Was Only His Homework Assignment

So there I was, sitting with Greg at The Chocolate Bar. We were talking and sipping cappuccinos, having a genuine, thoughtful conversation about our hometowns, families, and uncertainties about settling in on a major. I learned that he grew up in Akron, Ohio, has four younger siblings, and he probably wants to do either history […]


Legal: The NEC is a dope work of satire.